How Do You Cope With PTSD?

This was a question that took me by surprise. I never answer this question when I'm asked. I try to bypass or avoid it. I don't like thinking about the painful parts of my life. I guess if it helps someone, I better find a way to discuss it, right?

Here's the question.

"How do you cope with PTSD?"

Having PTSD.... it's not easy, in all honesty. I'm lost, separated, anxious and ready to burst a lot of the time. My mind just rushes back to things I wish it wouldn't. I have a hard time communicating with people. I feel disconnected from the world.

I cope with my writing. I get lost and wrapped up in my own words. I reconnect with the world through my writing and the reviews people leave me. I feel like I'm able to communicate with my fans through my work. I release a lot of me into every book I write so I can release everything that's burning inside of me. I know, you're all like.. 'but your books are completely sexual...' Well, that is true. It's not about the sex, it's about everything that leads up to it. It's about everything after it. The sex is more my emotions exploding and me having my own release and form of connection. It's the only way I've ever been able to cope with this disease.

You know, it's funny. I reread my stuff after I've lost myself in it and time passes. I can't believe the things I've written down. Most of the time I blow my own mind. I don't feel like I have the talent to pull off a lot of the things I do. I write without a theme, without a direction, without an outline. So, to see how beautifully put together the books always turn out, it's fascinating. I don't think that far ahead, which is so unlike me. In a story, I don't think about anything. I just, go with the flow. You guys read... me getting lost and swept up in imaginary moments. Hell, some of you tell me my writing is some of the best sex you've ever read. That still has me in a daze, wondering if that's true or if you're just saying it. I hope it's true.

All in all, that burning question on if you should keep reading my books or if I'm just going to stop writing one day and leave you all on the hook. That's not going to happen. Writing is my happy place. It's how I cope. I need my writing. I'll be around for as long as I live. What once was a sweet escape for a day or two has led to an addiction. An addiction I refuse to give up. Writing is the best prescription.